giddy

When I think of him I instantly smile.

He tells me I’m pretty and I can accomplish anything I set my mind to.

I’m overwhelmed by his compliments.

My insecurities have now reared their ugly heads.

 

What does he see…..I don’t see it?

He tells me to trust in what he tells me.

Its such a new feeling for me that I just want to abandon ship.

Then I see him and I get all giggly and feel like I’m a school girl.

 

Is this the way its suppose to be?

Am I so used to being in control.

I got to get myself together

Perhaps I am losing control

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…oh well

Smooth chocolate brown skin, gleaming white teeth situated in a broad welcoming smile, dimples piercing plump cheeks full of sarcasm, perhaps choking on pettiness from the thoughts running through my head, while this set of eyes gaze upon this full figure of mine

 

What is taking so long

He is not going to say anything

Another one bites the dust

Competition

Unable to read your mind

I am no longer consumed with trying to be who you defined me to be

HE created me in HIS image

Not to suit your insecure limitations

Absolutely vivacious

Exuberantly enjoying my life

 

We were envisioned to be sociable entities

Yet alone I seemingly always end up being

Unable to mold into the brainless enigmas that consume social media

I am a formidable presence that shines forth discrepancies in your mundane infatuations

Many common denominators can be found in your design

Unfortunately my mind steps outside of those stagnant lines

 

First day of spring

New ideals have sprung

Messages from all forms of communication

Convicting hauntings of what use to be

Awaiting the blossoms of the seeds planted

Disappointed by the harvest

 

Teary eyed the reasoning becomes clear

The expectations I have transcends the demands of other women

Old fashioned ideals of being courted, swept off of my feet, romantic spontaneous dates

Seem to be a labyrinth in this day and time

All I can surmise is that it’s not meant to be

It should not be this complicated, really

 

beautifleye