Worth

A comment was made recently
You don’t know your worth
I took a pause and contemplated the cause of this erroneous judgment
Such colorful commentary must come from a place of dismay
Every fiber of me wanted to scream I do that’s why I chose not to date you
Unfortunately you took my rejection of your offer the wrong way
The caliber of man that I desire apparently wasn’t one of your strong aspects
I don’t date for hobby purposes
Courting has an intended direction of pursuit
The reverse psychology trick may have impressed the lady you left  behind
Your offense may have scored in the last quarter
Perhaps you need someone to upgrade you
I can no longer pour into you until there’s no more left of me
Now you’re ready to conquer the world
Scampering around like a squirrel
As I scramble to collect my perils
Every stand of my pearls
Accounts for a disillusioned moment of companionship
I’m made for a purpose
That which is not to be what you want, need, or desire me to be
My light shines so brightly
To enlighten thee
At my lowest moment of darkness
I felt the spark
Depression nested in my confidence for years
Praise God spears of grace dismantled that place
Through transformation I’m able to stand
Realizing my worth is priceless
As your retinal scanner malfunctions
Your words become random
As your brain tries to figure why my barcode won’t register
You thought your tactics were clever
Move on to your next endeavor
This pursuit of happiness has been severed

beautifleye

LOW

 

Is how I feel
How far my stomach has sank

There is nothing left in my emotions tank
The location of my heart is in my chest
This stage of my life was supposed to be over
She wasn’t invited to this stage of my journey
Her feelings weren’t supposed to be considered
Am I going backwards
Is this my meeting at maturity crossroads
Perhaps this is the test He sent to me

This cliff is so visually stimulating
Am I being met where I am right now
This seems so familiar
Yet vastly different
I’m not having a sense of remorse for these actions
My heart shattered when I realized the hole was still empty
The need has grown in itself
The usual has caused a greater casualty
I’ve fully understood the soul tie aspect
My emotions were unfortunately involved

It seemed so brand new
Views now skewed through mood swings of instability
Trying to prove to myself that he really liked me

He liked the desperation in making his acquaintance
Aggression has once again led to a disgruntled conclusion
Feelings of confusion
My heart is in need of an emergency operation
Uneasy glimpses of separation
Causing minor bruising of my ego
A humbling blow to my psyche
This pain in my chest feels more like a contusion

My transcribed thoughts of elation are being infused through constant daydreaming
Wake up I scream to myself
Release the stress
You weren’t meant to experience this mess
Check in with Him
See he wasn’t even supposed to cross your lens
Your free will investigated
Now you’re left devastated

Every wink now seems like a slap in the face
My heart has been defaced
I signed up for the wrong race
This wasn’t supposed to be the pace
As I lay flat on my face

This disgrace envelopes me like a blanket
No need to try to erase the memories
These are opportunities for advancement
This feeling of complacency was adjacent to normalcy
Convincingly I gained confidence and sprouted
However that new growth should have been stunted
Cut off completely

Hi how are you doing beautiful

It’s so nice to meet ME

Beautifleye